CategoryPersonal Growth

Saying Yes to Everything Will Get You Nothing You Want – LOP068

Saying Yes to Everything Will Get You Nothing You Want

Are you a “Yes-person”, someone who says yes to everything, because you think if you don’t, people might not like or respect you? If you’re a gay man, did you start saying YES to everyone as a way to deflect attention from who you are? As a way to stay hidden in the closet? Perhaps Saying YES Became a (bad) Habit. You said yes more and more...

Being At Ease With Yourself – LOP067

Being At Ease With Yourself

“…from the standpoint of the ego, the universe is seen as the “other.” The ego concludes that this “other” is against it and, therefore, that I must struggle to survive.”The Tao of Abundance, Laurence G. Boldt Are You Struggling in Any Part of Your Life? Is your love life, career, or your life purpose a problem or are you at ease with who you are...

Is Instagram to Blame for Gay Thirst Traps or Those Who Follow? LOP064

Instagram to Blame for Gay Thirst Traps or Those Who Follow

Reading my Twitter feed last week, I read this knee-jerk reaction to people with beautiful bodies posting pictures of themselves on Instagram, AKA “Thirst Traps”: Hyperbolic language doesn’t solve problems. Putting all of Instagram and gay thirst traps into a single container generally makes things worse. This is the path of blaming...

A Conscious Meditation on the Gap

Conscious Meditation on the Gap

Entering the space between all things. There is nothing but space between worry and fear. There is nothing but space between love and hate. There is nothing but space between acceptance and rejection. There is nothing but space… …between right and wrong, …between you and me, …between us and them, …between male and female, or masculine...

Fear of “The Other” is Defence of the Ego – LOP059

Fear of "The Other" in Defence of the Ego

The basic human fear of anyone else who is unlike us, too dissimilar, or who holds a different view of the world is the original binary. The original binary is the ego versus all else. The binary begins early in life when we learn our name; our identity. Who we are – at the level of our name, our ego – separates us from everyone else. “Ego is a...

There Is No Space Between Us In The Gap – LOP053

No Space Between Us In The Gap

Today’s episode takes the form of a meditative thought experiment. An awareness came through me this morning while moving in my fitness routine. My mind was open to the subconscious drip of what I had experienced and witnessed over the weekend. I had been contemplating – without attachment – how to express the beginning of a new perspective. ...

Darren is a leadership coach in Toronto, Canada who helps his clients to connect and embrace their uniqueness and freely create the life they want. He writes and podcasts regularly about Queer Leadership.