CategoryComing Out

If You Had a Message to Your Younger, Queer Self, What Would it Be?

If You Had a Message to Your Younger, Queer Self, What Would it Be

In August 2019, for the second year in a row, I attended Fierté Montreal Pride with my partner, Christiaan. Montreal Pride has an energy to it that is unique and quite different from Toronto Pride. I don’t know anything about the politics (other than the history of two competing Pride Festivals for several years until one organization finally...

My Interview on Gay Radio Show, Rainbow Country – LOP097

Rainbow Country Interview

Mark Tara is an LGBT Content Creator, Recording Artist, and the Creator & Host of the Gay radio show, Rainbow Country 🌈, heard every Tuesday from 11pm-1am on CIUT 89.5FM in Toronto. Mark invited me on the show to talk about coaching, how I became a coach, and why I choose to offer my Life Coaching primarily to GBT men. We also talk about my...

Have You Left The Best Parts Of You In The Closet?

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There are two examples from my life when I was living fully out, gay and proud, and expressing who I was – other than now when I feel like I’m all gay all the time! 🙂 In retrospect, within the limitations of the status quo at those times, I came out “too much and too far.” The outside influences and opinions of other people forced parts of me back...

The Reluctance to Lead as Out Gay Men: Embracing Gay Spirit – LOP058

Reluctance to Lead as Out Gay Men Embracing Gay Spirit

Living OUT Leadership for Gay Men “Gay spirit speaks to the vitality that gay men possess, which is palpable but defies easy description.”Raymond Rigoglioso I believe that gay men have a unique opportunity to openly embrace their unique characteristics – in particular, their gay spirt – to bring a balanced, empathetic approach to leadership, and...

Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer Is a Queer Hero’s Journey – LOP041

Rudolph Red Nose Reindeer Queer Hero’s Journey

Viewing the 1964 cartoon through a queer lens. As a little boy, I loved the classic Christmas cartoon, Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer. I must’ve watched it every Christmas as a child, then as a teenager, and almost every year since. Rudolph was my first queer role model and boy was he ever fierce! Rudolph showed a strength of character at a young...

How My Parents Influenced My Gay Male Identity – LOP040

Parents Influenced My Gay Male Identity

Our earliest influences that form who we become as adults start with our parents. While I am certainly not saying that my parents made me gay; how I was raised absolutely influenced my identity as a gay male. We looked up to our parents as children. We believed everything they told us to be true. They were our first leaders. We learned how to...

Forgiveness and Acceptance of Internalized Homophobia – LOP039

Self-Acceptance of Internalized Homophobia

Gay men can lead others in a new model of forgiveness through their own healing of gay shame and understanding of homophobia. We can evolve as men who understand and embrace the dichotomy of masculine and feminine energies. As gay men, we struggled with forgiveness when we first came out. We had to learn to forgive ourselves for the lies...

From Sissy Boys to Straight-Acting Gay Men

Sissy Boys to Straight-Acting Gay Men

Forgiveness and Self-Acceptance Starts with Understanding Our Gay Shame. Forgiveness allows you to live in the now, to have the self-worth to be able to let go of your past and all the transgressions you may have suffered – but not to condone or forget the actions of others. Gay men can lead humanity with a new model of forgiveness through their...

Is Forgiveness of Homophobia a Gay Male Gift? LOP030

Forgiveness of Homophobia a Gay Male Gift

In this episode, I speak about the challenge for gay men to forgive homophobia in their lives – be it from individuals, family, and society at large. The topic for the episode was inspired by a discussion of models of forgiveness in Raymond L. Rigolisoso’s ground-breaking book, “Gay Men and The New Way Forward” and from his coaching group...

Darren is a leadership coach in Toronto, Canada who helps his clients to connect and embrace their uniqueness and freely create the life they want. He writes and podcasts regularly about Queer Leadership.