T-Minus 15 Minutes To Lasting Change

The following is an excerpt from my latest free book, The Four Steps To Solve Your Problems Guide. You only need a few steps to make lasting, positive changes in your life. These steps are not complicated. The process doesn’t require reading a 300-page book, taking an 5-week online course, or days of getting ready to […]

What Does “Living OUT the Best of Me” Feel Like?

As a gay man, what would it mean to live out the best of you? For me it’s about understanding if I’ve left the best parts of me in the closet, and which of those parts I want to bring out and enjoy living. Let me give you an example from my own life. When I was […]

The Problem of Freedom of Choice vs Discrimination

Over the last few days I’ve been monitoring responses to one of my articles on Medium, Not Having to Bake Cakes for LGBTQ People Is an Insult to Humanity. I responded to the most lengthy comment  by writing a post instead of a direct response. I’ve been publishing articles on Th-Ink Queerly since November 2017. I’m surprised […]

The Freedom of Accepting Who You Are Right Now

“When you drop the struggle with shame and accept life as it is without judgment, you find great freedom on the other side. It is freedom to be who you are, exactly as you are. The only real meaning in life is found in being who you are right now, without apologies.” ~ The Velvet […]

Shoving My Queer Agenda in Your Face — Take It!

For as long as I can remember it’s always been a man and a woman. For as long as I can remember it’s always been about god. For as long as I can remember it’s always been about fitting in. I have never had sex with a woman. I never want to. I have known I […]

Kevin Spacey, #MeToo, And The Problem Of Gay Shame

“As those closest to me know, in my life I have had relationships with both men and women. I have loved and had romantic encounters with men throughout my life, and I choose now to live as a gay man. I want to deal with this honestly and openly and that starts with examining my […]

Today I Saw My Body in the Mirror and It’s Ageing

Actually, I wanted to write that my body has betrayed me. That sounds more dramatic and outside of my control. The truth is that as I was leaning in towards the bathroom mirror to floss my teeth the other night, I looked down. I looked down and in a moment of self-preservation unconsciousness I let […]

What I Learned About Loving My Body As A Gay Man

Everyone has a story about their body. Some of us want to look great for the beach, to feel powerful and sexy when we’re in bed with someone, or to move easily without pain or discomfort. My body’s story has everything to do with being gay. As a kid I was always sick and had more […]