Who Are You?
Would you call yourself a deep thinker, someone who leads a deeply self-examined life? Perhaps you are a writer, an academic, a social justice entrepreneur, or working in a leadership role to better humanity. You are someone who wants to make the world a better place, one that is more welcoming of diversity and LGBTQ acceptance and equality.
People compliment you on your intellect. You’re probably an introvert, a life-long learner, highly intuitive, analytical, and a keen observer of the world. You’re a truth-seeker and you tell it like it is (which sometimes gets you into trouble). You enjoy coming up with elegant solutions that solve problems. Small-talk is anathema to you; you prefer a thought-provoking conversation with one person over meeting 10 random strangers at a party.
When things don’t go your way you feel like something must be wrong with you. You get quiet and shut yourself off from the world. You become a perfectionist, thinking you can control every detail including external expectations and other people. You doubt yourself and become defensive when you don’t feel respected for what you believe to be true, or validated for your perspective. Try as you might, you cannot hide how you are feeling and you wear your emotions on your sleeve.
What Brings You Here?
If you’re anything like me you want to create or do something that will make the world a better place. You want to use your difference, your unique insights, to make a difference.
Are you asking yourself questions like, “What now?”, or, “Is that all there is?” Are you in a job or a career that has taken you to where you thought you wanted to go professionally and financially, but now you only feel boredom and dissatisfaction? If you answered yes, that’s wonderful because now you can find out what’s missing.
What I’ve discovered over the years, is that many of my clients lacked an understanding of their mission or life purpose. They weren’t aware of their emotional drivers, which when actively exercised make you feel like you are doing the right thing. Other missing factors that play a supporting role are knowing your core values and creative genius, doing the sort of work you are best at and will give you a sense of well-being. Without that combination of factors, you will feel a sense of dissatisfaction in life.
If you are missing any or all of the above, you’ll most likely remain unmotivated, de-energized, and uncertain about what to do next to feel like you are making a difference.
My Coaching Philosophy
“When you know yourself, you can use your creative genius to manifest the changes you want to see in the world.”
When you know how and which thoughts are holding you back, you can change your way of thinking to more efficiently accomplish your goals. Emotion is the ultimate decider of your behaviours, habits, and choices; good or bad. Words shape your reality. Choose your words with care to say what you mean and how you mean it.
My Coaching Model
When we start our coaching work together we will establish a set of Pillars that support my Coaching Philosophy. These pillars support effective self-actualization, personal well-being, and success (but I do prefer to call that “thriving”). Like an Ancient Greek temple, if one of the pillars is damaged, the roof is weakened and may collapse. The pillars are:
- Your Self-Examination: Knowing yourself is not a passive description or a narrative of your life. True self-awareness is an act of truth and personal responsibility to be your most authentic self, and to share that gift of self-actualization with the world.
- Your Emotional Driver: This is the fire that feeds your motivation and drives your purpose. Your emotional driver is what validates who you are and is the best example of knowing yourself.
- Your Core Values: When you don’t know your values, you have no compass to stay on track, no way to “evaluate” what’s good or bad for your life. These values represent what’s most meaningful, joyful, and important to accomplishing your purpose.
- Your Purpose in Life: Your purpose or mission may feel like what you are called to do, pulling you towards the future, but always in the present moment working on what you want to accomplish. Your purpose informs your goals, which impact your core values and is intimately connected to your emotional driver.
- Your Creative Genius: This is your gift, your magic, your superpower, your master skill. Most other people see this in you before you do, simply because you are too absorbed in this part of who you are to see it. When you “exercise your genius” you might feel like you are “home”.
Regular Practices Support the Principles
My Practices are the foundation or the exercises that support the Principles to help you thrive in all areas of your life. These Practices support your transformation, which in coaching is about identity transformation, or becoming/realizing who you truly are. The practices are not a “must-do” list that you have to follow, rather, they are options to be selected and practiced where appropriate and most needed. The practices may be as innocuous as regular exercise or meditation, or more specific systems or structure around planning, communication, or relationships.
How Can You Use Your Difference to Make a Difference?
As LGBTQ people we have unique and vital insights to teach others. We are different from our straight counterparts. Hence the word, “Queer” meaning different or odd, as in not part of the status quo. I am fascinated by the qualities that make up what I call, “The Way of Queer Leadership”, the characteristics that I believe make LGBTQ people a vital and creative part of society.
Our work as a collective of queer thinkers is to embrace, demonstrate, and advocate a humanitarian leadership of belonging. As queer people, we can lead from the margins to unite humanity, to reduce the divisiveness between people with courage, visibility, and collaboration.
Working with Me
There are currently two ways of working with me at the moment:
- Unlimited Coaching
- Structured Coaching
With this 5-month commitment, we will work together as much as you need to manifest the changes or outcomes you want. We will structure our initial calls around establishing the core principles and any supporting practices unique to you and your needs. After that, a regular coaching call structure will help keep you on track, with as many calls or emails as needed in-between.
My work is not hourly based, rather I work to help you achieve an outcome (something that will never have a fixed amount of hours). You might need to speak with me for 10 or 20 minutes to gain clarity between our regular calls, or you might have a brilliant idea or feel stuck and need to speak with me right away. Unlimited coaching gives you the freedom to accomplish your goals more quickly by getting clarity and self-direction more often. This commitment is especially useful if you are about to start or already at work on a project that requires a significant time and energy commitment to complete.
With structured coaching, we will meet for a regular coaching call twice every month over a 5-month period. We will structure our initial calls around establishing the core principles and any supporting practices unique to you and your needs. After that, our twice-monthly coaching calls will help you to get clarity about what’s most important and how to maximize your personal efficiency to manifest the changes or outcomes you want to accomplish and to thrive. Email support is provided in-between calls in a structured manner to be discussed.
If any of the above speaks to you, let’s have a conversation.
Click the button below and complete the questionnaire to tell me more about yourself, and what you want to accomplish by working with me as your coach. I will contact you once I have reviewed your answers to book a discovery coaching session.